Demented

This website is just fucking demented. It's your internet source for plastic action figures demonstrating ashtanga yoga. No, really.

This post features the webmistriss, Elastigirl, and all six of the GI Joe Sigma 6 operative action figures demonstrating utthita parsvakonasana and parivritta parsvakonasana:

Duke: "Kamakura, what the holy bleeding fuck are you doing?"

Kamakura: "Sir! I am attempting to do the pose, sir!"

Duke: "We are not putting on a goddamn Broadway show here, Kamakura. This is not A Chorus Line."

Kamakura: "Sir! I find I am able to lunge quite deeply but my torso lacks the articulation needed to fold over my bent knee, Sir!"

Duke: "Kamakura, the point of these two poses is to create a line of energy running from your grounded back foot all the way up through your spine and shooting out your fingertips. Like a spear, a warrior's spear, son! That's why your pretty little nancy ass is here, because you're a warrior! Or am I mistaken? Are you or are you not a warrior!"

Kamakura: "Sir! I am a warrior, sir!"

Duke: "Then, Mother of God, start acting like one. Look at Storm Shadow there in front of you, he's got a nice modification going with his elbow resting on his knee and his left arm stretching up. Try that."

Kamakura: "Sir! Om shanti, sir!"

There's so much more. Truly, it's almost enough to make me sign up for a yoga class. Especially if Bendy Marge Simpson is the guest instructor. As Elastigirl notes, "Her yogic knowledge is so deep that her daily practice consists of mixing cake batter in a Tupperware bowl while doing advanced pranayama, which really gets her chakras a-whirlin'."